How to Control Your Emotions in the Moment: Tips to Stay Cool and Calm

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Learning how to control your emotions in the moment is something even the most mindful people struggle with.

As human beings, we’re exposed to a broad spectrum of feelings, from passionate love to seething anger.

Instead of letting your emotions get the best of you, knowing how to control them can help you better handle a situation.

Blinkist is an invaluable resource for expanding your knowledge with controlling your emotions.

Their collection of short, easily digestible synopses and “shortcasts” give you the info you need in far less time.

From your favorite mindfulness podcasts to self-help books, you’ll find 27 different categories for you to explore.

How to Control Your Emotions in the Moment

The journey to becoming an emotionally intelligent person starts with getting your feelings under control.

There’s no doubt that emotions are an essential part of your daily existence, especially when they’re positive.

As an outlet for mental health and emotional support, it’s important to know how to regulate what you’re feeling.

There are several ways to control your emotions in any given situation, even when they seem too big to handle.

Let’s explore some of the top-rated tips to help you reign in your feelings for some much-needed self-care.

1. Pause Your Thinking

Before you even begin managing what you’re feeling, the very first thing you need to do is pause.

Take a break from the immediate situation, separating yourself from the obstacle you’re facing.

By pausing, you can analyze the situation and determine if feeling intensely will contribute to the predicament.

This point is crucial when you’re feeling intense emotions, such as anger, sadness, or jealousy.

Will a reactionary expression benefit the situation, or is it bound to make it worse?

Are you going to say something in the heat of the moment that you’ll regret at a later date?

When you begin to feel yourself losing control, take a step back before you say anything.

This step of mindfulness will help prevent you from burning bridges or making an irreversible decision.

2. Consider the Impact

Once you’ve separated yourself from the situation, you’ll want to analyze the impact your words could have next.

Not all intense emotions trigger negative responses—for example, happiness.

It’s totally normal for you to feel something so deeply that it feels like it will burst through your chest.

However, it’s your responsibility to realize the effects your feelings could have on the situation and others.

If you were to express the actual depth of your feelings, would it cause irreparable damage?

Would you make the other person in the situation uncomfortable or upset?

By looking at the impact of your emotions, you can then decide what the next best steps are.

It’s a fantastic way to ensure that you don’t overwhelm the other party or yourself with what you’re feeling.

Whether it’s a positive or negative engagement, make sure you’ll leave the situation with both parties feeling good.

how to control your emotions in the moment tips

3. Think About Your Tone

In most cases, it’s impossible not to say anything, especially when you’ve reached a point where your emotions are overflowing.

For these situations, you should consider your tone and volume when speaking.

The louder you are, the harsher you come across, which can set the wrong tone for the situation.

Even when you’re happy, if your tone and volume are too overbearing, it can feel too overwhelming.

Put yourself in the other person’s shoes: if they were loud and overly emotional, would it make you uncomfortable?

Also, you’ll want to consider the tone of the current conversation and know how to proceed.

If the other party is screaming with anger, would it be beneficial to fight fire with fire? Most likely not.

As such, you’ll want to respond with a calmer, more rational tone.

In comparison, if the situation is complex and the other party is too laid-back, using a stricter tone could be beneficial.

Regardless of the situation, your responsibility is to deescalate the tone of the conversation to a cordial one.

Keep the phrase “tone it down” in mind, which will surely help you find your voice’s ideal tone and volume.

By maintaining control of your emotions in this way, the conversation is bound to sway in your favor.

4. Learn When to Listen

It can be tempting to be the loudest person in an argument, especially when making a point.

However, many engagements aren’t occurring simply because the other party wants to argue.

It’s more often that people simply want to express their feelings about a particular situation.

Even if the other party isn’t as emotionally mature as you, it’s essential to know how to take turns listening.

Sometimes, it can be better to say nothing at all and simply let them express how they’re feeling.

Once they’ve gotten everything out, you can respond in a calm, relaxed manner.

You would be surprised at the sheer number of confrontations that you can resolve simply by listening.

Even if the conversation seems exaggerated or extreme, remember that the other party’s feelings are valid.

Withhold your desire to respond in an unkind or intense manner, taking the higher road by considering their feelings.

Another crucial effect of listening is that it can be the key to the other party hearing you out.

Once they’ve exhausted their emotional power bank, they’ll be more likely to hear what you have to say.

It can make conversations far more effective, especially when both parties have their turn to speak.

5. Ground Yourself and Breathe

Managing stressful situations can seem impossible without grounding and breathing exercises.

Even in the direst situations, taking a moment to focus on calming down can cause exceptional benefits.

Focus on your body and release tension, allowing your joints to soften while repeating a soothing mantra.

Unclench your jaw, relax your fists, concentrate on your heart rate, and slow it down.

Box breathing, a method often used by Navy SEALS, can be a fantastic solution for managing your calmness.

Here, you’ll breathe in for four seconds, hold it for four seconds, and exhale for four seconds.

For added soothing, hold your empty lungs for four seconds before repeating the process.

It’s a fantastic way to regulate your heart rate while also calming your mind to engage in a conversation more thoughtfully.

This process is beneficial for those who are prone to anger before any other emotion.

6. Explore the Benefits of Blinkist

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Learning how to control your emotions is something that’ll become second nature with the right advice.

Blinkist is an innovative platform designed to offer informative content to help broaden your mind and explore your true abilities.

Instead of spending weeks reading helpful books about improving your emotional maturity, you can consume the same content in minutes.

Blinkist summarizes over 27 categories’ worth of books, giving you the most important information straight away.

You’ll learn how to manage what you’re feeling effectively with great titles from renowned authors like Hardwiring Happiness by Rick Hanson.

It’s time for you to stop putting your emotional education on the back burner and unlock the benefits of shortcasts and Blinkist Blinks.

Unlock a New Brain Science with Hardwiring Happiness by Rick Hanson, Ph.D.

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Hardwiring Happiness takes an innovative approach to mindfulness and managing emotions rooted in neuroscience.

Written by Rick Hanson, Ph.D., this best-selling book is filled with practical everyday methods to assist with wellbeing.

You’ll have troves of easy-to-follow steps to assist you with inner peace, especially when coming upon stressful situations.

By working through these steps, you’ll be able to manage your fight-or-flight response, leaving the “red-zone” of emotions.

You’ll then slowly work your way into the “green zone,” which comprises self-fulfillment, love, and ease.

By boosting your inner strengths, you’ll be able to capture more positive emotions, build your balance, and improve resilience.

There are many emotional and mental benefits you’re bound to experience with this read.

Increased motivation, healing from past trauma, and dealing with troublesome relationships are just a few examples.

At the end of the day, you’ll be able to work against feeling unnecessarily anxious, inadequate, and lonely.

Final Thoughts

Knowing how to control your emotions in the moment is a struggle that everyone encounters at one point.

To become the most emotionally mature person in the room means significantly improving your personal relationships.

With the help of Blinkist’s easily digestible content, self-control has never been a more approachable topic than now.

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